The 15.2-mile half-marathon

That's right - 15.2. For reals. Your run-of the mill half-marathon goes only for 13.1 miles. Apparently I decided that was for sissies. So Flat Jenny and I not only went the extra mile but the extra two. How? Keep reading.

Here we are getting out of the car. As you can see, poor Flat Jenny was already suffering from an injury. Luckily my friends Emily and Amy helped tape her up and she was good as new at the race start.

This particular half-marathon benefits the American River Trail. The trail is over 30 miles through trees, poppy fields, gigantic turkeys, deer, rattlesnakes (yes, I saw one once) and, of course, the American River. It's down the street from where my husband grew up and I wish it were that close to my family. I'd be on it every day!

This was my second year for this race. There were some problems with running out of water at the aid stations last year. (Are you kidding me? You CAN'T run out of aid for people who are paying for it!) This year's stations were much better. The signs, on the other hand, were another problem.

Last year I won for my age group. I planned to do so again this year improve both my overall position and my time. I have been training for a full year for this race, as there are not many walking races around. According to my GPS watch, as of mile 6 I was averaging 11:30 per mile, was in 5th place overall and easily first in my age group. I was thrilled. (Remember, I'm walking - this is a pretty fast walk!)

THEN I got to the turnaround. First of all, the people at the aid station seemed confused, obviously they weren't in to their role yet, as there hadn't been many racers and we were slightly spread apart. I didn't know which way to go and had to yell to get someone's attention to see if I was supposed to go straight or right. I also had to go over to the table to grab water since no one was watching out for the early racers. No big deal, I thought, I turned right and continued on the path.

Here's the major problem. The path was not marked well - at all. I don't know if there was supposed to be someone there directing racers or if there were signs, but I did not see anything or anyone to let me know where to go. Since I hadn't seen anyone either in front of me or behind me since mile 5.5, I continued along the path I was on, assuming I was OK. I didn't want to cheat and try to cut to the left, but I hadn't seen a turn sign yet so I continued on until the path stopped. I panicked and began to hyperventilate. I had been exerting every bit of effort I had into the race and when I realized I was lost I became disoriented and couldn't find my way back to the aid station. I found some bikers who told me which direction the race was but they were teasing me and I ended up going even farther the wrong way.

By the time I finally found some racers on the turnaround, I continued on until I found the EMTs. I have asthma and wasn't able to breath well. I sat with the EMTs for about 15 minutes as I tried to calm down. I was very, very angry and if I had found a race official there I would have probably been taken to jail for bodily harm (they lucked out this time). As I was there I looked at my watch again. I had gone almost 9 miles instead of 6.5 because the race was poorly marked.

After leaving the aid station my body still felt good but I was DONE mentally. I could have given up and hitched a ride back to the start but, and I quote Flat Jenny here, "Baby, that's just not our style." I have a great race playlist on my ipod but I didn't really fell like listening to it anymore. Luckily we'd just come back from a really long car trip. I'd loaded the ipods with movies and guess what was on mine - Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure!

I hope it's not too embarrassing to admit that I love, love this movie. Listening to it as Jenny and I zoomed past all the slow pokes who caught up to me during my sojourn in the wilderness put me in a much better mood. Shout out to Socrates Johnson, Ted Theodore Logan, Mr. The Kid and Bill S. Preston, Esquire. I finished the race feeling really good and thanks to all the extra endorphins I didn't want to harm anyone anymore. (I did write a strongly worded letter to the race director though. He hasn't responded yet. Maybe he got lost too.)

Somehow I was still 5th in my age group this year. This is amazing to me. Obviously all the people under 40 are still running. They should try speed walking. It's full of glamorous prizes.

Yeah Flat Jenny! We did it!

PS - San Dimas High School football RULES!

Taking it slowly

Look carefully at the bottom of this photo.

That's right. It's a friendly snail. This, unfortunately, is an action shot of Saturday's power walk.

We were supposed to go 12 miles. We went a half mile and realized we wouldn't make it the full 12. The muscles behind my knee hurt - a lot. This maaaaaay have something to do with the 23 miles the week before. No problem, I thought. We'll just do 6. We finished the first mile when I made an executive decision to turn around right then. I'd rather skip a few workouts than injure myself.

We are currently not injuring ourselves by visiting with family in Arizona. One family member is pregnant with twins. We have been "fueling" for future races with her. Flat Jenny and I have been enjoying that a lot.

There is nothing fun about 4:30 in the morning

After my mission I decided I was never getting up early for the rest of my life. This worked for a while. I took afternoon classes at BYU and having a job that requires you to show up at 9:00 isn't so bad. Then I had kids - kids who like to wake up early. There must have been a mix-up at the hospital three times. I have finally trained them to not wake me up before 7:00, but still sometimes I accidently see the sun rise. When it came to motivation this morning the 20 miles I was about to do did not intimidate me - waking up in the middle of the night did.

A friend's daughter was being baptized this morning and I really wanted to go. I had a few options: 1. skip the workout, 2. wake up at 4, do 10 miles out and back and drive over with the family, or 3. just do the workout TO the baptism. I know, #3 sounds pretty nuts but it was going to give me an extra 30 minutes of sleep. Easy decision. Also, there was a shower there so I wouldn't stink. Cecilee's baptism was at the Stake Center next door to the Sacramento Temple, which, by perfect chance, is exactly 20 miles from my house.

As I shoveled down the oatmeal in my kitchen this morning I just kept thinking, "If Oprah can do it, I can do it. If Oprah can do it, I can do it. If Oprah can do it, I can do it." Not that Oprah is my model of health, but she did do a marathon. If Oprah can run a marathon I should be able to kick my self out of bed in the dark every once in a while.

Things were going really well. I had plenty of water and food, my husband texted directions to my phone so I couldn't get lost, plus my ipod was chock full of NPR podcasts so I wouldn't get bored. (Some might disagree with that last part but that's just the kind of gal I am - kind of nerdy as well as physically fit.) Then at about 18.5 miles I hit the freeway. Uh, oops. In all my advance planning I hadn't considered that I couldn't cross where I wanted to. CARS could cross there, just not people - if they wanted to live.

No problem, I thought. I'll just go to the next exit and cross there. I was following a bike path and the jogger I asked said that the next exit was just "a little ways away." Yes, that's true . . . by car! By this point I didn't care if I had to go "a little ways" out of my way. I had decided to walk to the Temple and by jove, if my people could cross the plains and Oprah could run a marathon and I could wake up ON PURPOSE at 4:30 on a Saturday then I was going to do it!

So here we are, just after 20 miles, saying hello to a very shy CA Parks parking attendant. He works at the Nimbus Fish Hatchery, a wonderfully exciting place where elementary school kids learn about the life cycle of Salmon. I'm sure other things happen there too when it's not Salmon time but I'm not sure what they are. In any case, the trails around there were certainly pretty and I was certainly pleased with the power of Zyrtec.

We continued "a little ways away" and made it to the Temple entrance! Whoooo! Then we went up a massive, massive hill. Whoouuugh! But we made it. We added an extra three miles to the already completely obscene mileage for the day and had bragging rights forever. (What did you do this weekend? Oh, nothing much, except I walked to the Temple . . . )

Here's Flat Jenny crashing a wedding.

Oh Flat Jenny, I didn't know you had it in you!

And here she is congratulating the newlyweds. I'm pretty sure she had artichokes in her bouquet, which is very Central California chic. (Upon closer inspection I realize they are NOT artichokes but 23 miles makes you think wedding bouquets have veggies in them, I guess.) How weird is this? I had no problems asking them to pose for a photo but I was too shy to ask for their names. So congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Artichoke! Here's to a long and happy life together - and to sleeping in on Saturdays!

Cisco

No, not "The Thong Song" guy, that was Sisqo, and don't you think it's kind of embarrassing that we all remember that song anyway? What the title of this post means is the company Flat Jenny and I walked all round yesterday - Cisco Systems. We went six miles through beautiful Santa Clara, CA. My sister lives there amid gorgeous landscaping, high-tech companies and apartment buildings.

There's also a pretty beautiful nature center there. I was planning to go on the trails but, as you can see, once we got there we realized the trails were just six inches wide and the rest was ginormous plants and grasses. I'm not too familiar with this area and was a touch concerned that perhaps the nature center was a hide-out for the region's attack turkeys. About 50 feet in I decided to turn around - and run (yes, run) out of there.

Instead Flat Jenny and I walked around Cisco for six miles. Seriously, that place is HUGE. We went by building after building and parking lot after parking lot for the company.

There were also plenty of light rail stations all around. Here's Flat Jenny with her own personal station.

Look carefully. This says "Moving is the best medicine." Here's hoping Flat Jenny is making non-flat Jenny healthier!

Flat Jenny & Laurie's Adventure

From Laurie:

Jenny and I have something in common - neither of us can run. Jenny's inability to run is due to a very bratty disease. Mine is due to bratty genetics. A few years ago my doctor, who after several tests diagnosed me with osteoporosis (at 37 - awesome), told me a list of things I cannot ever do again. Included on the list was no skiing, no tackle football (For real - do I look like a football player?) and no running. I then went through a few of my favorite exercises and asked if I could do those. NO. I asked him what I COULD do and he said, "Walking is a great exercise." Please. Walking is for old ladies.

I was mad. My husband had just signed up for his first marathon and I was feeling sorry for myself. My exercise options seemed so lame. Was I going to have to sneak into the 65+ water aerobics classes? No thanks. As Scott was looking on a race website he noticed that you're allowed to walk marathons if you can do it under the time limit. Hummm. I could do that.

So then, because apparently I am very easily persuaded to do good things for my body when I am mad, I decided to show my bratty genes what I thought of them. I decided to be not just any old lady walker, but a freakishly fast one. Yeah, so there, porous bones. As it turns out, I'm pretty darn fast. Yes, I look a little silly (OK, let's be honest, you've seen the racewalkers on TV, they look CRAZY) but I'm having fun, I feel great after a long, long walk and now I have a flat friend to go along with me.

Enough background. Let's get on to the adventures!

Here's flat Jenny in my kitchen (giving my scary callused toes a massage) before she was carefully folded up and put into my backpack. Sadly, some of those toenails are actually that color in real life. At least I still have all my toenails! While inside the backpack Jenny enjoyed eating a banana, energy bar and gel. She was pretty thirsty after all that and went through three refills of the water bottle.

I was pretty nervous. I'd never done 18 miles before. The hospital is about seven miles from my house so I thought I should head in that direction. I figured it wouldn't be a bad idea to be by a hospital because anyone going 18 miles was either sick in the head or just plain sick.

There were lots of fun things to see on the way to the hospital. About five miles in we passed the mall that burned down last fall. Here is a photo of it when it was still smoking. It's almost back to normal now - whew - except the DownEast Basics is not coming back.

One of my favorite things about California in the spring are the poppies. (Important note: this photo is not of a real poppy but part of a state flower embroidery project I found today. I think I feel a new project coming on!) California Poppies all over the place in my neighborhood! Flat Jenny and I felt a little more relaxed every time we walked past a big clump of them.

We did not feel quite as relaxed when we saw these jokers. Not only is my neighborhood filled with the state flower, but also these gigantic turkeys! Doesn't it seem like turkeys are something that just live on farms or in ye olden days or yore? I swear they are as big as a Kindergartner. They actually kind of freak me out. They way they move always remind me the scene in Jurassic Park when the velociraptors were walking around the kitchen. We also saw lizards, by the way. They do not scare me.

Somehow we made it to the hospital, past the hospital, into a neighborhood with bigger trees and fancier cars than on my block, back to the hospital, back past the poppies and freaky turkeys and back to my home sweet home. We did it, Flat Jenny, we did it! (Or as Dora would say, ¡Lo hicimos!)